Phone, E-mail, Awkward Pauses and Humanity

Frequently, I'll browse websites for products and services. Occasionally, I'll have a question about the product or service. As often as possible, I will call rather than e-mail in hopes of getting my question answered. I prefer a phone call because I'm more likely to forge a real human connection, even if it's brief. I follow this same preference of communication with my friends, because most of the time my friendships are strengthened by stream-of-conscience phone conversations rather than perfunctory e-mails.

Here's the thing. In e-mail correspondence, people are generally brief, to-the-point, and professional. Cold. Part of this is laziness, part of this is e-mail etiquette. There is very little chance of discussing anything besides the purpose of the e-mail (to plan a date, to get confirmation of an event, to get a simple question answered, etc.).

But in phone correspondence, the possibility of a genuine human connection is much more viable. One of the principal pillars of phone etiquette is to avoid awkward pauses, silences and lulls. The conversation should always be flowing. When people follow this, more words are said to fill the air and avoid silence. When more words are said, there's more of a chance that commonalities can be discovered between the people having the conversation. When commonalities are found between people, there is a connection.

True, sometimes people are just as short and professional on the phone as they are in e-mail. And that's not bad, because it's another way to avoid awkward pauses: say what needs to be said and get off the phone. However, in e-mail correspondence, there is little possibility of the human connection at all. There is no need to say anything extra because there's no pressure to keep a live conversation going. You can take as long as you want to respond, and when you do, all you have to do is address the basic purpose of the e-mail.

In an e-mail, you're typing with a name through text. In a phone conversation, you're speaking with a person through voice/speech, and it's a live conversation. The former is almost devoid of real human interaction. The latter makes human interaction more possible.

IMPACT: With the advent of electronic communication, e-mail correspondences are ubiquitous. I think that "shoot me an e-mail" is more often said than "give me a call." This means that the aggregate number of human connections is arguably shrinking, which is not good for humanity. So next time someone gives you their business card, try dialing their phone number instead of querying their e-mail. You just might make a connection.